"My whole model of the future has been shaken. Who will I be without children? Can life still be fulfilling? Can our relationship survive through all of these treatments?"
Infertility is an incredibly common and often hidden issue many couples face. In the classic American prescription for happiness (as it goes)- You fall in love, get married, get the house with the fence, and right before you cross the black and white checkered finish line of parenthood - life throws on the breaks. It has different plans it seems. The shock and fear can be overwhelming and we begin to wrestle with our implicit models of how our lives were to go. But, as research shows, you are absolutely not alone.1 in 6 couples struggle to get pregnant after actively trying for a year and many more continue to struggle sustaining a pregnancy long after that. Even further, roughly 50% of infertility cases are Male Factor Infertility. This is an often overseen and definitely not talked about infertility statistic. We can feel let down by our bodies, full of guilt, self-blame, and hopelessness. Concerns about our future, our relationship, even deep questions about life, purpose, and fulfillment emerge.
I offer this specialty in my practice not because I have specialized training or a particular certificate but because this journey is also a personal one. I know what the waiting room feels like at your first fertility appointment. The uncertainty, the hope, the disappointment, the hope again. This journey requires a lot of support and as a psychologist, my wife and I found our own during this time and it was vital to getting through. You need a place to talk, to learn how to support one another, to feel, to plan, to put into perspective. I think it helps to have a psychologist whom you don't have to explain what an "IUI" is or "pgs testing", or the significance of a "transfer day." Research has even shown that getting this kind of support increases the likelihood that treatments will work. I want to offer you space on this journey, whether you are in it alone or with your significant other. I want my office to be a place of refuge for the heavy emotions that come with the journey, or if you are wrestling with what life will be after all options are exhausted. Whether you are recently diagnosed with a condition affecting fertility, mid-IVF, or processing and navigating life after treatments - I am here. Please give me a call if this is you. I want to help, bring care, and walk alongside as you navigate this chapter in your life.